Yeah that’s right. I’m going in. Fully. Let’s talk about that thing we don’t always want to talk about. I’m talking about that icky thing we call money.
Why Money?
Well, I have come to realize that I have a shitty relationship with it. I want to be friends with money so bad, but I’m being that needy, desperate chick about it. I just want money to like me. Why won’t it like me?
I know a lot of the stories and beliefs I have made up about money come from my childhood. Money was never talked about unless we were being told how we don’t have it. Every dream and fantasy slashed mercilessly in front of us because we were not worthy of having money. Scarcity joined us for breakfast, lunch, and dinner every day whether he was welcome or not.
So, what does this mean for me now?
I’ve developed certain habits and thoughts about money that are potentially keeping me from it. It might sound silly, but it’s true. Through my research about money, I’ve learned that a) money is energy and b) money likes to flow. This means, contrary to my old beliefs, that money comes AND goes. If I spend it, it will come back, and if we are friends with it, it will come back bigger and better. What’s the other thing I’ve learned? It pays to give it away. Give. Just give. Don’t expect it back, or use it to have power over people or things, just know that if you give it away in it’s purest form, it will come back as your BFF.
What I’m about to share with you is very personal and scary for me to share and I’m going to do it anyway. So far in my life, I have had the belief that money comes to me through some sort of suffering or compromise. I’ve never felt like I’ve had it easy with money. It’s pretty painful for me. I haven’t always respected it either. Sometimes I’d spend more than I had and I didn’t ever give it away or do kind things for others with it. Mostly because I was so afraid that I wouldn’t have enough to make it. I have never had any sort of support around it either, from a very young age, I worked and earned for myself. My family didn’t have enough for themselves let alone to give me any. So, if I fail, I’m on my own. This. Is. Scary.
Here’s my opportunity: Money flows to me through joy and ease. – TWEETABLE
I’m looking to improve my financial health and therefore, my relationship with the ol’ pocketbook.
How?
- I’m becoming more aware of how I think about it. If I start to get tight and feel stressed about it’s ‘lack’, I remember to bring my thoughts back to everything that I have, and how I have everything I need.
- When talking to people and choosing activities, instead of saying, “I can’t afford that”, I choose to say, “this is where my focus is right now” because it really is where we are choosing to spend our money. Just because my friends are choosing something different than I am, it doesn’t mean I am less than, or missing out.
- Respecting it. I honor my commitments and lifestyle and stay within my means. Excess is never a good thing, and neither is holding back. I treat myself in a healthy way, and I save at the same time.
- Knowing that I am resourceful. I know I can create more when and if I need more. I am willing to show up for myself. I don’t expect it to come into my lap (although once in a while that would be nice!)
- I am not afraid to talk about it. I don’t treat it like something I’m embarrassed about.
- I don’t avoid paying my bills. I am grateful and thankful for every one of those services that I choose to be a part of, and that’s my commitment to myself.
- I choose to give it away. Go for tea with a friend, pay for the entire bill. Offer to bring a care package for a sick friend. Randomly buy someone a gift, just because. Give to a good cause. There are so many great ways to give it away.
- Receiving it. Letting people buy me a tea or coffee, letting my partner pay for the groceries or help me out if I need it. This tells myself and the universe that I deserve it, that I am worthy of help and gifts. When people pay for things for me, no matter how small, it makes me cringe and I want to vomit. This is going to change.
- Asking for help. It doesn’t make me any less able or strong or whatever else. This doesn’t always mean asking for them to give me money, it could mean helping with ideas, or jobs or even connecting me with someone that could use some help or temporary work. This can lead to very good things.
- Reading about it. Learning more about what things work, what practices can be fruitful, what other things can I try. There are a couple of books that I’ve been recommended, which I will read and continue to share my findings. The books are: The Soul of Money, The Money Keys, and The Law of Divine Compensation.
My questions for you are:
What do you think or feel your relationship is with money?
Are you happy with where you’re at?
Do you want to improve it?
Do you have any positive tips to share on how things transformed for you?
Are you scared to talk about it?
Do you know where your fear comes from?
These are all good questions to ask yourself.
Thank you for reading!
What I’m grateful for:
- My wonderful, feminine, magical, sparkly home
- My tech gadgets (Apple obsessed)
- My comfy and fabulous bed (and other furniture)
- That I can nourish my body with good foods
- That I can take care of my skin with lovely skin care products and makeup
- That I have clothes that reflect me and that I feel great in
- And, SO MUCH MORE!
Tyra had a transformational experience in Bali, Dec 2014 and ever since has been practicing self-love and living beyond fear.