I’m Full

Months in waiting,

The palpable anticipation,

Of Their arrival

Time mimicked that of a snail taking a stroll along a cobblestone road

And then just as we’d hoped

The time had come 

The squeaks and embraces a plenty

I’m full

I’m home

They’re home

Immense joy

In a blink of an eye

It was but a dream 

I still hear the laughter and scurries of little feet 

Ghosts of what was

An empty house

Heart emptier still

Each room is filled with their scent, memories, their stories 

I search for them like a pup for their mother

Why must it be so

Where did our time go

Separated by the vast ocean 

Swayed by the waves 

In the darkness, I sit

Wishing for the time I lay waiting 

Or when I felt full

Full of love and family and full of heart

Emptiness courses my body as if it were hollow 

I pray for numbness, to forget, to rewind

I send them love, and myself 

Until we meet again 

My sweet loves

Until I’m full again. 

– Freya Pirbhai, September 7, 2022